I Walk The Line

Like many kids, my kids are playing sports. Like many parents, I'd like to just show up and watch them and tell them how good then did and go home. I want it to be easy and painless and, like the introvert that I am, I don't want any more forced interaction than are necessary. I have guilt though. Stupid guilt. This comes from the realization that kids sports are run by volunteers. Somebody has to step up organize and coach if these organized sports leagues are going to be possible. If I only had one kid I could probably convince myself that we were a really small load on the system so I didn't really need to help. I have four though. When two of them end up on the same soccer team we're 1/4 of the whole team. My family makes up a significant enough portion of the players that I feel like not giving back is sort of like stealing. Stupid guilt.

I coached little league basketball for two years and simultaneously loved and hated it. For the most part I loved coaching the kids. This was the youngest age group so nobody could really shoot and at least half of them couldn't dribble when we started. By the end of a single season everyone could dribble and pass and had an understanding of what basketball was. They could defend and get open for a pass. Even though I had a terrible win/loss ratio both years, all of my players scored during a game. I was proud of the boys and it was fun. I hated dealing with the parents. Hated it. Most were nice but it only takes a couple that really want to get involved verbally, but not at all with the actual work of coaching, to make the situation miserable. Couple that with other coaches that were poor sports or poor at dealing with children or poor at both and I faced every game with a combination of joy and terror.
When my kids switched to soccer I convinced my wife that it was her time to coach before I got an ulcer or had a nervous breakdown. She's coached for two years and has been spectacular it it. So wonderful in fact that people request to be on the team that she's coaching. She still has a few issues with parents but they are a magnitude or two less than I had in basketball. When she went to her first coaches meeting she did manage to find a way to keep me involved. She volunteered me as the field striper. Once a week I have to head up to the fields and take out my trusty little painting cart and make the lines straight and pretty. I do it when there's nobody there and it's one of the most peaceful and satisfying hours of my week. I've often daydreamed while I'm walking along painting the fields of seeking employment with a NFL team. Then I realize that they're probably a bit more advanced than one guy with a striping cart. They probably have a whole crew and striping robots with GPS and it's probably quite a high pressure job and I don't want any part of that.
As a stay at home day you're going to hear the phrase "You don't work, you can help!" more than a few times over the years. You need resist the urge to choke the person who has been quietly typing at their desk all day while you have been dealing with screaming toddlers for 12 hours. Sometimes, if you look around, you can find a calming, peaceful, lonely, guilt assuaging job like field maintenance.